Month: January 2014

Insane Gluten Free and Dairy Free Pancetta Alfredo

Insane Gluten-Free and Dairy-Free Pancetta AlfredoImage


Recently, Nicole was diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis. As with many things, food and diet play a huge role into how your body reacts. One important thing for the disease is to avoid a lot of potential food allergens, as well as anything that can cause inflammation (which the majority of the time go hand-in-hand). To a bit less serious about the ordeal, Nicole really wanted bacon and Robb really wanted noodles. Thus stemming this somewhat obscure reference to an alfredo or ummm . . . almond cheese sauce. It does sound weird, but believe us, when everything gets together it’s INSAAAANE.


What you’ll need:

1 cup Unsweetened almond milk

Approx 1/2 cup Almond milk cheese

1/4 lb. of Pancetta and bacon mixed

4 Portobello mushrooms

1 box Gluten free penne noodles

5 Garlic Cloves (yes, we like garlic)

1/2 Onion 

2 Shallots

1 Tbs. Coconut oil

Fresh sage (to taste)

Fresh ground pepper

Red wine (of choice!)


Now, before you get started, this first step is crucial to the execution of the dish. Pour yourself and your assistant a glass of wine.

Second major point, there is never enough garlic or pepper for either of us. Add the amounts that you please to your recipe.


Next! Make sure the onions, garlic, and shallots are chopped with care. In hopes that the juicy and smoky cured meats would soon be there. Rough cut the pancetta, bacon, and portobello mushrooms. Then, finish this off with a beautiful light browning in the coconut oil. Halfway through, sprinkle in some fresh-chopped sage and ground pepper. After everything looks beautifully browned, set this pan aside, and place a lid on it.



In pan number two, we started the cheese sauce.

Insane efficiency tip:  While you’re starting this, also start to boil water for your noodles.

For lack of better word, the cheese sauce can be a bit tricky. For starters, by definition, it isn’t exactly cheese. First, pour the almond milk into the pan. While that heats, chop some of the “cheese” into small flat rectangles. After the almond milk starts to slowly simmer, add the chopped cheese to the mix. A flat spatula is a great tool to use. With this handy little device, you can clean the sides of the pan, stir the milk, and mash the cheese. The more it heats up the better it gets. At this time, it is a good idea to also throw in some more sage and pepper if it suits you. Get this mixture as smooth as you can. Please don’t be discouraged if the texture is a bit different. Once you get it in your dish, you won’t even remember what the texture was like.


Cook your noodles al dente, then strain them.

Use your creative freedom to plate this however you would like.



Insane recommendation:  If you want to spice up the dish more, it was great with smoked paprika and cayenne. 

However, we do not recommend adding any salt to this recipe. Cured meats are very salty on their own.